Reluctantly Fade Away

Waited past midnight 
for stones to be tossed 
on my window pane,
Til the Sand Man 
made his way 
sending me on an alternative 
journey ~
Mr. Goodbar 
took my hand 
leading me to dreams 
of another
kind...
Singing lullabies 
with fingers crossed 
and a wink of transparent eyes...

You - reluctantly fade away ~

Early morning light, 
rays shinning through 
cracks shades drawn...
They spoke 
in hushed tones 
of old and new 
as if you had been 
mislaid,
Only I knew 
of your true demise 
and your favorite 
hiding places~
Their veracity and rhetoric 
suffocated you 
to the core,
With secret ties 
and swaying lies, 
clutching hands 
like a deceptive
lover...
Some bonds 
are never broken, 
easily...
hearts and spirits untamed
We would kiss 
in filtered shadows, 
hiding from the storm...
As the grains of sand 
unknowingly slipped 
beneath our feet
Yours and mine, 
entwined promises - 
slit of the wrist 
our blood
mingles
Lovers in the night ~
And time is of no value 
in a world indulging
illusive rants 
and raves
While outside, 
looking beyond 
the golden gates and
high walls...
I wonder,
Do you remember me
...more thought 
than question posed...
Touching deep, 
a bullet lodged 
in the left side 
of your brain
You were 
an easy target 
with an X 
conveniently 
marking the spot
"...taking a breath now,
...is like a dagger's jagged edge..."
"...never cutting clean through..." 
your whispered words 
subside
I miss your smile - 
corners taped 
with glimmering hope
the naivete 
in your eyes
now glazed over 
and gray
A permanent reality 
has been fit 
to an inconsequential mold -
And you no longer 
really exist...
...and...I

I - reluctantly fade away ~ 

© 2014 TrilbyYates