Pretty Girls

Off to my right somewhere deep
within a void of empty space
time lapse shifting gears reverse
I can hear voices
silly chatter from Pretty Girls
silly chatter that is reminiscent
of days gone by
like a sledgehammer
coming down on me
slamming against my brain
opening old wounds
the ones hidden deep inside
wrapped tightly within layers
of insecurities, fears and sins
cardboard box 
gift wrapped - no silk ribbon
no celebratory greeting card
I love you, Anonymous
camouflaged like a soldier
hiding from the enemy
always under fire
under the microscope
of drones and starlight
Pretty girls with long finger tips
full lips - hair glistening
under florescent lights
silly chatter, laughter floats 
above what doesn't matter
innocently oblivious to surroundings 
- with a different bend
a swift perspective
judgment call
from all sides up, down
uncomfortable shift
eyes hide - good, bad, evil
"Who the fuck do you think you are…"
- attitude vents from obscurity
obvious distraction, stumbled upon
left foot slips from the sidewalk
and all is not lost on a few
patience runs thin
and memories are a flip-book
out of real time - out of sync
Pretty Girls smile with sincerity
at someone on the other side
hand tremble coffee spill
morning rush hour trip up
who knew what was buried
deep inside could be so easily 
uncovered by the silly chatter 
of Pretty Girls… 

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Footsteps In The Sand

When the veil is shed layer by layer 
A glimmering light from the never forgotten 
Is dulled by the glow of a not to distant future 
A shift in ones heart beat and state of mind 
Will ride out the storm that peacefully anticipates
The reoccurrence when the Widow meets the Captain 
From years ago on a tempestuous night 
In a far a way land when the past and present 
Did not collide leading two souls 
To fall from one pedestal to another 
Only to land in loving hands 
That could not be denied 
Yet forbidden in a world 
Of choice and morality 
Atonement as a Guardian Angel 
So lines do not become blurred  
Or washed out to sea 
As the tide sweeps away 
Lover’s footsteps in the sand 
Only to long for another time
To create those footsteps once again…

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Aura Of Decadence

There is no time like the present
Keep one foot in the here and now
While the other dangles freely – wind beneath
One hand waves farewell to new comers
The other tips the head waiter with a smirk
Wooden nickels hold a value in this Land of Oz
Like souvenirs at a carnival - children smile
And even though this ghost ship is half empty
Like the champagne glass resting peacefully - aura of decadence
The heart cannot let go of dreams and visions
Plans left incomplete, anniversaries come and go

I will follow…
                  In time,
                              in bitter sweet time ~ 


© 2015 TrilbyYates

Deviant Past

The days 
Shorter now
Nights longer...
Appearing darker 
Than the norm
Without the slightest 
Hint of an artists color
Creative minds 
Freeze dry
Skyline falls flat
Just a hint of sepia
But only around 
The rough edges
And I have a hole 
In my one size fits all 
Italian handmade 
100% cotton shirt
Revealing more 
Than my self exposed
Deviant Past
And there is
A loose thread
From talking to much
And most likely 
...way to fast 
And a button 
Fell off of my 
Personal favorite
Pinstriped mannish 
Looking vest 
Rolling out 
With the grandeur
Of the infamous 
Velveteen carpet
Into oncoming traffic
Just when the light 
Was turning from 
A  cautionary  
Sunshine yellow 
To a blood curdling
Crimson red 
What could I do 
What could be said 
I've been stopped
In my forever hesitant
Walking backwards
And always covered 
Self absorbed tracks
Can't seem to find 
The perfect reflection
Or the perfect match
While always burning
A scented candle
At both ends 
And from where 
I am standing 
At the end of this 
Oh so lovely pier
Waves rolling in 
A repetitive taunt 
Hypnotic intention 
I maintain a blank 
Yet stoic stare
While the Man In The Moon 
Knows all too well
It is the end 
Of just another day
Glancing up at his 
Historical expression 
All I want to do 
Is slap that grin 
Off his distant
Untouchable face...
Putting an end
To the haunting progression
This invisible place
Instead I lose 
My footing once more
Sweetly blanketed
Cellophane Pseudo Sea
The familiar Sound 
My only safe haven 
So I will conclude 
And soulfully concede
Taking a deep breath 
While I quietly weep
I have but one choice 
That is to reluctantly give in
...and take it to the deep ~

© 2014 TrilbyYates

Wise Ass Kid

Those days 
When thoughts 
Swirled around 
In my mind 
Creating an energy 
Cause and effect 
Suddenly out of thin air 
A call or note 
Song from the past
A nudge from
Turbulent times
A cosmic force connects 
A reminder tap tap
You can never go back
Although I lean on the belief
Nothing is set in stone
Except birth and death
Those sweet innocent days
Are few and far between
So be careful who you 
Day dream about 
Strangers appear 
In familiar garb
Time passes snap
and mindful images 
Never seem to fade 
Wishful thinking 
Is an independent luxury 
Like a journey to an exotic
Far away unknown land 
Scrolling through photographs 
and tag lines eyes blur to focus
Wondering playfully - pause
What's going to happen next 
The wheels turn slower 
and the clock ticks louder 
Adjusting the bar downward
Dragging realistic wants and needs
Lacking subtle expectations 
To an abrupt unexpected halt 
Gears jam and all I can do 
Is scream profanities into a void
Pathetic reminiscent childlike questions
and obscene childlike gestures
Blurted out with no rational
Like a wise ass kid hanging 
On any city street corner
In any city in the world
Unique - not unto its own
Self absorbed truth seeker
Asking why always why
As if expecting some profound
Heavenly answer to fall peacefully
Settling at my feet
Like a feather from the nest
Pride is a virtue
Ego is a vice  
I continuously stumble around
Exhausted from the battle
My internal war rages on ...


© 2014 TrilbyYates

Happier Days Are On The Rise

Surprised at the emotions
spurred by photographs of you
a past romance and tenderness
not forgotten.
But a touch of fear
begins to surface - a simple notion
from chest to throat,
a slight pulse rise.
What if you feel
my lingering thoughts,
as they pass from here to there?
Would you even care?
No barriers when the mind
shoots energy into time and space;
dare I enter this long ago place?
...the wave surfaces
once more...

I have often wondered
about you,
and all that you
would become.
Never regretting
moments shared;
entangled lovers,
even as we exposed
the most vulnerable
parts of ourselves...
Was it a lack of trust
that spiraled the two of us
in a different direction?
As your hand slipped from mine,
there seemed little to be said -
no loss of affection, 
it was never about rejection...
there was no reason, no rhyme
...warmhearted
words remain unspoken...

Our lives intertwined
repeatedly over time
as if the Gods had a plan.
Now, as I look to my left
there is a young boy
that mirrors images of innocence,
a youthful - you and me.
And, although I knew intuitively;
fear being my only guide,
of what was meant to be.
Consequences ebb and flow
today with reason and with rhyme
all my purpose and intent
I continually suppose...
What might have been - 

Choices made and reality borrowed
there is always time for tears and sorrow
I have had my share - you too, I may never know.
But I will always remember one thing to be true
it was a gentler time shared between
me and you...
Happier days are on the rise ~


© 2014 TrilbyYates     

Reluctantly Fade Away

Waited past midnight 
for stones to be tossed 
on my window pane,
Til the Sand Man 
made his way 
sending me on an alternative 
journey ~
Mr. Goodbar 
took my hand 
leading me to dreams 
of another
kind...
Singing lullabies 
with fingers crossed 
and a wink of transparent eyes...

You - reluctantly fade away ~

Early morning light, 
rays shinning through 
cracks shades drawn...
They spoke 
in hushed tones 
of old and new 
as if you had been 
mislaid,
Only I knew 
of your true demise 
and your favorite 
hiding places~
Their veracity and rhetoric 
suffocated you 
to the core,
With secret ties 
and swaying lies, 
clutching hands 
like a deceptive
lover...
Some bonds 
are never broken, 
easily...
hearts and spirits untamed
We would kiss 
in filtered shadows, 
hiding from the storm...
As the grains of sand 
unknowingly slipped 
beneath our feet
Yours and mine, 
entwined promises - 
slit of the wrist 
our blood
mingles
Lovers in the night ~
And time is of no value 
in a world indulging
illusive rants 
and raves
While outside, 
looking beyond 
the golden gates and
high walls...
I wonder,
Do you remember me
...more thought 
than question posed...
Touching deep, 
a bullet lodged 
in the left side 
of your brain
You were 
an easy target 
with an X 
conveniently 
marking the spot
"...taking a breath now,
...is like a dagger's jagged edge..."
"...never cutting clean through..." 
your whispered words 
subside
I miss your smile - 
corners taped 
with glimmering hope
the naivete 
in your eyes
now glazed over 
and gray
A permanent reality 
has been fit 
to an inconsequential mold -
And you no longer 
really exist...
...and...I

I - reluctantly fade away ~ 

© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Guess I'm Doing Fine - 6.2011

Trilby Yates

Guess I'm Doing Fine ~ Beck

There's a blue bird at my window
I can't hear the songs he sings
All the jewels in heaven
They don't look the same to me

I just wade the tides that turned
Till I learn to leave the past behind

It's only lies that I'm living
It's only tears that I'm crying
It's only you that I'm losing
Guess I'm doing fine

All the battlements are empty
And the moon is laying low
Yellow roses in the graveyard
Got no time to watch them grow

Now I bade a friend farewell
I can do whatever pleases me

It's only lies that I'm living
It's only tears that I'm crying
It's only you that I'm losing
Guess I'm doing fine

Press my face up to the window
To see how warm it is inside
See the things that I've been missing
Missing all this time

It's only lies that I'm living
It's only tears that I'm crying
It's only you that I'm losing
Guess I'm doing fine

Holiday weekend...summer kick off 2010

Sharing The Same Mirror

We share the same mirror, the two of us
me on the left, you on the right,
...a slight blur between us
Two shadows sharing the same mirror
reflections of a past
maybe a promise for a future
who knows what it holds
and who cares when skipping the light fantastic
Time has been good to you
you smile
and I laugh at your vanity and flaunt my own
with a twist of my hair and red lipstick lips
that speak a version of the truth
A bleeding heart that cherishes the moments
few and far between
when love has been more than a band aid for what's been missing
Sharing the same mirror
the two of us
shadows from another time

© 2010 Trilby Yates