Wise Ass Kid

Those days 
When thoughts 
Swirled around 
In my mind 
Creating an energy 
Cause and effect 
Suddenly out of thin air 
A call or note 
Song from the past
A nudge from
Turbulent times
A cosmic force connects 
A reminder tap tap
You can never go back
Although I lean on the belief
Nothing is set in stone
Except birth and death
Those sweet innocent days
Are few and far between
So be careful who you 
Day dream about 
Strangers appear 
In familiar garb
Time passes snap
and mindful images 
Never seem to fade 
Wishful thinking 
Is an independent luxury 
Like a journey to an exotic
Far away unknown land 
Scrolling through photographs 
and tag lines eyes blur to focus
Wondering playfully - pause
What's going to happen next 
The wheels turn slower 
and the clock ticks louder 
Adjusting the bar downward
Dragging realistic wants and needs
Lacking subtle expectations 
To an abrupt unexpected halt 
Gears jam and all I can do 
Is scream profanities into a void
Pathetic reminiscent childlike questions
and obscene childlike gestures
Blurted out with no rational
Like a wise ass kid hanging 
On any city street corner
In any city in the world
Unique - not unto its own
Self absorbed truth seeker
Asking why always why
As if expecting some profound
Heavenly answer to fall peacefully
Settling at my feet
Like a feather from the nest
Pride is a virtue
Ego is a vice  
I continuously stumble around
Exhausted from the battle
My internal war rages on ...


© 2014 TrilbyYates

Now and Then ~ July 1, 2011

Trilby Yates

Trilby Yates

Jerry Yates

Trilby and Jerry Yates

A lifetime ~ our lifetime.  An anniversary, dreams and memories ~
I'll always be with you...always...

Summer breeze...

Whispers...

You press your fingers to my lips
whispering not to fret
while you find your way
in another world
that has no place
for lovers or the touch of your hand to mine
even as I slip into a shallow dream
there are no images that embrace me
the way that you do
when fear takes hold
dragging me to the ground
I reach for you
only to find a void
hollowness that rattles me to my core
again and again
I am thrown into the certainty
that my nightmares
are no longer restricted to reverie
they have become my day to day truth…


Photographs ~ Jerry and Trilby Yates

© 2008 Pamela Viscomi Yates

There is no magic in "six" months...

You are love
the source
of sounds that echo
late at night
when all is calm
still…
off in the distance
hearing your laughter
I look deep into the darkness
I see your eyes
smile…
reaching out
touching my heart
in a way
that only you could…
as time passes
from one day into the next
I will kiss the wind
send it off to you…
in a place that is
everlasting~

Long Way

I walk this path
without a purpose
it seems there isn’t any need for a map
following your lead
or the direction of something that is greater
than the both of us
a particular sort of life force
or creator with pull
or push every so often
when my feet are firmly planted in denial
frozen during a moment in time
not wanting to travel forward
fear cannot face any transformation
conceding that you are no more
all the promises made
the vows spoken delicately
whispered in the night
prayers said in silence
to the omnipotent
Rosary Beads lose their luster
and passion for results seem deficient
when the place to my left
is vacant and somber
suddenly my eternal home
appears much further than I thought…

Eternal Light

The season’s change and life goes on
without a second thought
or
cautionary pause
the heart doesn’t skip a beat
as a child is born
we hear the first cry,
we see the first breathe
fill the lungs
and
all hope begins
taking that first step
towards an eternal
light…
in another room
down a long dark corridor
without a second thought
or
cautionary pause
the heart skips a beat
as a life passes on
we see the last breathe
as it empties the lungs
and
all hope fades
as the ending
begins
taking the last step
towards
an eternal
light ~

Optimism Denied

Wedding day optimism
shining on both of us
as we walked hand in hand
to our future,
one step at a time and
not always looking
ahead prudently
playing games and
making love
photographs and posing
the way you knew
I would like to remember
your eyes
unpredictable green and
you’d flash a smile
with that wise guy expression and
I’d fall in love with you
all over again
regardless of those moments
that the sky felt like it was falling in on us
we always held onto the vow
of a lifetime together
not aware
that the time frame
would be limited and
when the ambulance came
with flashing lights and
siren blaring
we still didn’t see the end coming –
last glance and
few words spoken
I saw your life fade
before my very eyes and
I knew
but couldn’t grasp the reality
that you were truly
gone ~

It's six months today that my husband passed away...and so many people have said that there is a turning point in the "sixth" month. Maybe I'm different, but there has been no shift for me...one day, one week...six months - it's all the same...

© 2008 Pamela Viscomi Yates