I Don't Waste Time

You lean a little 
to the left
drawing me closer 
pulling me into 
your heart
Your hands 
are tender
but I can still feel 
your inner strength
...and I don't move away
All that matters 
is the feel 
of your face 
close to mine
I am in awe 
of the way 
you seep into me 
and never move 
completely through
I've been told 
I wear my emotions
on my sleeve...and I do
that's perfectly fine with me
and it's OK with you
I don't waste time 
and wonder
how we sleep 
so soundly
while the neighborhood 
burns generational-ly 
to the ground
- because we are shut inside out
And all I want 
to feel 
are your arms 
wrapped tightly 
around me
I don't waste time 
and wonder
how a society 
can continually beat
its people 
into the ground
...and still sleep so soundly
the way we do...
Smoldering ash 
flies high
and gently falls 
up and never down
leaving a thin 
sheer blanket
just the slightest trace
yet nothing 
is transparent
The truth is veiled 
the way a secret 
is never told 
The truth is hidden 
but someday 
it will unfold
...it will certainly unfold
I don't waste time 
and wonder
how we sleep 
so soundly
while the neighborhood 
burns generational-ly 
to the ground
- because we are shut inside out
And all I want 
to feel 
are your arms 
wrapped tightly 
around me
I don't waste time 
and wonder
how a society 
can continually beat
its people 
into the ground
...and still sleep so soundly
the way we do...

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Un-reciprocated Possibilities

Words dripping from my lips
mid sentence lapse of judgment
makes no sense to let them fall
but I'm feeling empty headed
And I can't get beyond my own thoughts 
and on a better day I would know
it's not about you at all...
- this is just about me

... now I'm stumbling around
like one of the three blind mice,
and maybe I should be undercover
but I can't seem to get out of my own way 
and you could look right through me 
and not have a thing to say
 - and it would be alright

Maybe you did not feel the burn the way I did
or the earth move beneath your feet 
And it doesn't really matter
because I can only speculate about you 
and only speak honestly for me...

I'm still mesmerized by the glow - basking in the glory
of un-reciprocated possibilities
and everyone has their own version 
even though it sounds like the same story
- this is just about me

... now I'm stumbling around
like one of the three blind mice,
and maybe I should be undercover
but I can't seem to get out of my own way 
and you could look right through me 
and not have a thing to say
- and it would be alright


© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Inconsequential Meeting

Had a dream about you last night;
seems since we had our inconsequential meeting - 
inconsequential feels so removed 
and so cold 
and my head hurts when I think
and I'm starting to feel too old 
to be a player in the dating game 
... anyway

Confirmation washes over me
like the cold waters of a great sea
confirmation washes over me

When I saw you my childhood sense 
of insecurity was shaken;
sort of rattled my proverbial ego sustained cage,
and now I'm reading the same lines
over and over again
still on the same damn page - 
- expecting a different ending

Confirmation washes over me
like the cold waters of a great sea
confirmation washes over me 

I never know what to think
when thinking is all I have time to do
I never know what to think
when the heart beats one way 
and the other is slightly out of sync 
...just never know how to feel
since my inconsequential meeting with you
And now I don't know what to think
... anyway

I had a dream about you ...


© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Who I Have Become

The first line is the most difficult
the most important
pen to paper expression
paramount to first impression
succession of intent
my perspective
is self inflicted 
is self infected 
self rejected and I know all to well
I'm not blaming you or me
the high or low tides at sea 
that change at different times 
or whenever
but never -  never...
depending on the moon
ebb and flow letting go
of my safety net I cannot forget - you
I have lost all sense of direction 
my perception skewed 
by misunderstandings
emotions commanding
and envelopes left un-opened 
words left un-read 
thoughts left un-said 
but you - you remain 
you are still there in my thoughts, 
my heart, my dreams - nightmares...
shadows scare hopes and clear the scope 
of what is what and who I have become
I ask the question and wait with bated breath
without bated possibilities - anticipation
without speculation of a higher powers response...
yet there is none
again I ask - who have I become...
silence echos loudly - but I am not keeping score
not now, not anymore
I battle with my internal voices, concede to my choices
and struggle with a subconscious war
I do not know who I have become
or who I am anymore...

© 2014 TrilbyYates  

Note To MB

(Scene set up: this was written a while ago...wounded pride, ego kept me from posting...but with all things as time passes so does negativity...moving forward brighter days ahead!)

Note to MB:

Nothing is keeping my feet on the ground 
short flight from yesterday 
filling up on jet fuel 
to keep all those tattered demons away.
And how do I separate you 
from a gift from God -
...when my heart was highjacked back in the day 
with a love that flowed forever so freely 
from him to me eyes so green it made my heart ache!
Now and then I walk past his grave 
and a hand from the "heavenly beyond" catches me off guard 
with a sense of warmth and recollection.

Today I question your intentions and my own 
because I don't need or want you 
the way I did him...

With warm regards for better luck next time around,
TY


© 2013 Trilby  

Grand Gesture

Grand gesture 
from high above 
fine line 
crossed
 by the 
remaining faithful 
and I continue 
to fall short 
of expectation 
when there 
is no place 
to land...

...float away on a cloud of perception 
rejoice in the abstract reflection 
I''ll lose not a night of sleep 
and pause at the mere rejection 
of your love ~ 

© 2013 Trilby