I Want

I walk a fine line, a tight rope from polar vortex to polar vortex 
A non space in the middle troposphere that extends into the stratosphere 
Earthly fears never hold me back; I don't ever look back
...except when reminiscing over candle light

I am a borderline narcissist as most of my friends;
- but isn't that just being human?
Isn't that all part of our DNA?
Don't blame mom and pop, blame Dr. Who with a foggy recollection
Dyno-gen pool mix and match his and hers blended 
Soaring colors shoot into the darkest pockets of a night sky 
Full moon blitz aurora borealis splintered shock wave dash!

I want to dance
- and sing; play my guitar 
I want to write with no inhibitions 
I want my passions to have no limits 
I want to kiss with no intention 
Love with no expectations 
Hold the one next to me
as if it is our last day 
on this lovely planet 
Our last day driving this vehicle 
into the ground 
And when my spirit lets go of the wheel 
there will be a band playing my favorite songs
The lights dim and the tight rope will snap
Sparks will soar whip lash perfection
My life will become beautiful once again


© 2016 TrilbyYates

Push The Beat

Oh man, man its a drop the straw from your mouth
head shaking spasm flash back to a past better left alone - moment
But anyway, remember, do you remember when I fell in love
and you didn't know what to do so you fell on your sword
- it only took that first drop of blood like a sign from the heavens above
that I was already in love with love and maybe not so much with you
And it really never made sense but felt damn good at the time
Right or wrong no one truly knows and yeah, I still don't sleep at night

You were like a kid in a candy shop; me, well I was the femme fatale 
wearing dark glasses, the shop keeper in a magic cape 
flying around throwing spells and fairy dust;
and when I turned the corner to take a deep introspective breath
you were stealing the baked goods and inventory 
- my heart shattered on the floor like splintered glass 
from a treasured past commonality you and me

So now when you want to share and reminisce; sing songs from the past
you should remember I like to slow things down and push the beat to a grind
Juke box four songs for a dime at least that's how I remember it, so...

Your arms felt good around my waist and if I close my eyes
dim the lights I can recall how it felt with my fingers
gently entwined through the strands your hair
and you would pull me close and take what little I had left
We laughed late into the night and never locked the doors

When you would leave I'd watch from the back seat
swearing that would be the last time and cursing the stars
as they fell from the sky for their brilliance and yours
...until you would throw stones at my window; revved up again

Could have been a jump start from story book romance cheap novels
bought and sold at Perry's Five and Dime other side of the track
and your fascination with folded pages in your father's Playboy mag
hidden in the laundry basket secret sleuth nothings lost 
when you're on the prowl

So now when you want to share and reminisce; sing songs from the past
you should remember I like to slow things down and push the beat to a grind
Juke box four songs for a dime at least that's how I remember it, so...

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Distant Drummer

Tiny pearls of wisdom
worn like a thorny crown
fall delicately
and lay in contrast
against tanned skin
of a woman's breast;
who once held
a passion for love
in the palm of her hand
As a sea breeze 
dances around her,
her precious soul floats
along the widows walk
without intent
Subtleties of a moment
captured like 
a ship in a bottle;
slight slip of sand
beneath her bare feet
Yet, she can still hear
the music in the wind
as it carries her heart
to that distant drummer
and hope is always there,
always on the up beat… 

© 2015 TrilbyYates 

Just Another "If I Could"

If I could I would...

Sell everything I own
Close all my bank accounts
Never pay taxes that would fund another war
Let my hair grow long and wear it in dread locks
Sleep on the beach under a sky filled with stars
Spend endless hours walking the shoreline collecting sea glass and shells
Once a week throw it all back and start all over again
Let the sun shine on me and not worry about anything
Sail away to a warm peaceful place
Drink wine from the bottle and date each cork with permanent marker
As if it were my last day on earth
Learn Italian, French, Spanish, Greek
Go to Italy
Spain
France
Ireland, Scotland, Wales…etc…
Own an apartment in Rome that has a window
With a magnificent view of the Trevi Fountain
Play the lead role in "La Dolce Vita"
Share a cup of espresso with Fellini and discuss “intent”…
Cruise my sailboat “Magdalene” on the Caribbean Sea
Following the sun from port to port
Keep my children close
Friends would come and visit
Nightmares would turn into beautiful daydreams
My heart would heal
Love would find me
Love would hold my hand
Love would never leave or fade…

If I could…I would… 

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Cloak And Dagger

Turning slowly
Eyes meet
Lock in an embrace
The words in my mind
Fall from your lips
Like pearls of wisdom
Dripping in sultry shades
Of day dreams
Soft lavender
With a touch of grey
Highlighting the shadows
That dance to and fro
Gentle lullaby
“Hush baby
Please don’t cry…”
Without warning
Shooting stars fall
The soul is cloaked
In a plush velvet robe
Blanketed gently by a pure
Winter snow
Covering what has yet to be seen
Magnified by a sharp pain
Like a dagger to the heart
Carving away
Silently

Cautionary tales of woe… 

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Death

So yes, I have hit the wall 
- many times
I've reached down 
in the darkness and found 
the bottom was still 
another 100 feet below me 
and all I can say 
with a hint of ambivalence
"...man what a trip, what a journey..." 

And all the introspective chatter 
and cliches passing thru the test of time 
held with the highest regard phrases 
don't hold an ounce of truth 
when the light at the end of the tunnel 
is a taunting echo of yourself 

Self help mumbo jumbo
new age movement
authors and prophets of old
who keep their secrets 
closely protected 
within their well guarded heart
while all along holding the key 
to their own mysteries 
...yet to be solved

And the passions rise 
when a nerve is struck
over and over again
their truth is well earned 
from their own rock bottom 
bouncing realizations 
when a light bulb moment
goes off the crowd kneels
and we all know it is
just another oxymoron 
but enlightens those in the dark 
without question none the less

Once again I am 
in a free fall 
seeing a lot of familiar faces
along the way
- and yet 
there is still no comfort 
in the masses 
and self pity is as destructive 
as falling on your own 
proverbial sword 
- it's all a ploy 
a way to make sense 
of the inevitable 
to maintain the purity of faith
in the smile of excellence
on your face
that it is sincere 
and not a reflection 
of one foot already planted 
firmly in the ground of fear

And that's not for me
I'm just saying man
that is not my way out 
my ashes will blow 
across the wide open sea
that sweet spot 
where land never 
reaches the eye
- carried by angels 
and when the time is right 
they will kiss me off 
into the wind I'll float
high above what was
once my reality

And in the distance 
a comforting voice 
will be heard 
whispers of welcome 
and a warm hand 
will reach out and touch 
that one remaining particle 
the ultimate human being
...death needs no introduction

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Dream On Dream On

Dream on 
Dream on and on
He says 
Only 27 questions 
To answer
And then you
Will know
....how to fall in love
Sitting in a cozy bar 
Some place in Brooklyn 
The candle light softens 
The harsher lines 
That have grown
Across the brow
And marionette lines 
That make a smile 
More of an conscious effort 
Than the natural way 
Your lips once parted
Corners turned up
Cherub's bow kissable
As the years dance on 
Dance on and on
The answers reveal 
More than his 
Heart's intentions
And yours races 
Out of insecurity 
Not for lack of lust
Or passion
But more out of 
A sense of caution
...these days 
To set the fire slowly
Rather than burn in a blaze 
Of no regrets and short felt glory
Dream on
Dream on and on 
He says 
Only 26 questions 
Left to answer
And then you
Will know
....how to fall in love 

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Mojo Kicking In

Slipping off pseudo
Dr. Freud's leather couch
$250 an hour
to soothe
my fevered brow
- ease a weary
torn soul
from thoughts
and memories
demons haunting past
that push the limits
crowding the 3rd eye
- blind
to a convoluted
way of life...
nothing travels
in a straight line
moving again 
and again
as the moon
swings around
the the earth
such a grandiose plan
- embroidered pillow sham
cushions my fall
landing on my knees
- a view you always preferred
looking down
from high above
the 69th floor
ivory towers crumble
...ashes to ashes
like silk intimates
dusting over
my body's curves
temperature rises
a tiny drop of sweat
slowly descends
a path downward
between
my breasts
You reach out...
slight of hand
smoke and mirrors
you are a master
 - of innocence
in its highest art form
hot red lights disguise
dark smooth skin
while guitar mesmerizes
with a 13 bar riff
sweet seductive harp
blowing upstage
rhythm and blues
pulsates a steady beat
that keeps time
an infamous bump and grind
wrapping itself around my body
like a sweltering sexy summer breeze
deep sigh - comfort zone
we begin to fly
another song and a shot of VO
there is no time lost
when your Mojo is kicking in
questions lingering from the past
sassy blues - idiosyncrasies
and contradictions
good times falling on bad
judgment days and cross roads
someones woman is waiting
in the the wind, you slip out
the back door - Johnny
Man...living blues
...it's all about living the blues

© 2014 TrilbyYates

Kisses In The Dark

Glass slipper shatters 
As you walk on water
Like the second coming 
Of someone of substance
Someone we have 
All been longing for
Only you care about the timing 
Of this desperate game
Life and all its little 
...inconsequential - s
Universal plan falls 
Neatly into place 
Like domino's standing 
In a carefully placed row
One behind the other 
If one hand trembles
Tin soldiers tumble and 
Suicide bombers explode 
At the sound 
Of bells ringing 
In a far, far away land
But, I have forgotten 
The truth
And color of your eyes
And you 
You can't recall my name
So with a bitter sweet farewell 
- 21 gun salute and flags flown 
At a mournful half staff
I bid to you and yours 
Whom ever they may be
A happy and prosperous new year
Words of warning as you turn 
Strut and stagger away 
One glass too many
One glass is never enough
Like kisses in the dark 
That slowly lead to paradise
Head tipped to the left 
Sympathetically diving off the curve
Last words slur and drip 
From your oh so seductive lips
"...don't accept Canadian coin 
from strangers and never cross Jack..."
The one eyed man observes more 
Than just you and me
His days are numbered with good intentions 
- one to ten and counting
And always, always remember 
To pause and reflect while twisting 
Your personally monogrammed 
Sterling silver knife
That one last meaningful

t...u...r...n...

© 2014 TrilbyYates

Lust And Passion

Hey...you...pssst...floating 
Lightly from high above
The cement masses
Whistles and cat calls
Reminiscent of a 50's B flick
With blonde bombshells 
And well manicured mustaches
That get twisted when the mood shifts
From scene to scene
Little girl with grown up shoes
Struts her stuff
While taking another puff
Long thin 100s imported 
Via her new daddy's 
Best stash dipped 
In candy coated cocaine
For character reference
And a little push
All for the sake of its own
Gentle manipulative shove
She slips from the right - side of the curve 
To the depths of hell in waiting
There is no bounce left in her step
Looking up with a child's eye
Batting her thick false lashes
Trying to disguise
Her lack of expertise
In matters of lust and passion
What entices the streets
Of a city that never sleeps;
Never protecting its young
and innocent - taking from the weak...?

© 2014 TrilbyYates

Temptation

Yes, I let you hold my hand
and I held yours...
- acknowledging a perfect fit
Yes, I let you look into my eyes
I curiously looked into yours...
- I didn't blink or turn away
letting you past the walls of protection
Yes, I let you pull me close to you;
wrap your arms around me 
and kiss me passionately
Yes, I reciprocated without hesitation
Yes, a warm wind blew 
time stood still
- and yes my heart raced 
Yes, I was intrigued, flattered 
and slightly bewildered 
Yes, all your words rang true
- and yes I am attracted to you 
Yes, I have thought about you since 
Yes, I have dreamed about you
the moment you leaned in 
and took my breath away
...welcoming you with delight
Yes, I have wondered 
what it would have been like...
if we had spent the night together
...if only, if only
Yes, I smile at the thought 
of our stolen moment
Yes, it seemed you found 
what I thought I had lost
- and genuinely returned it
Yes, we connected
Yes, I have no regrets

You might ask me why - my simple reply
"I let you into my head but not my heart darlin..."
And yes I would do it again...

© 2014 TrilbyYates

Looking Out To Sea

It was something 
something out of a movie scene
From Here To Eternity 
we were laying in the sand 
tide came up rushing over us 
all entangled arms and legs 
finger tips tracing 
a pathway to the soul 
your mouth on mine 
whispering words 
...you are so beautiful 
so beautiful...
kissing my neck 
gentle hands 
holding me close 
eyes closed
sensations like a hot wire 
and I heard a voice say 
I love you 
I love you...
and realized it was mine 
in that moment time stopped 
the tide went out 
and didn't come back in 
and we were standing 
looking at each other 
you had such a puzzled look 
on your face 
a puzzled look 
and I apologized 
I'm sorry 
I'm sorry 
I didn't mean to say that 
I don't love you 
I like you 
I care about you 
but I don't love you...like that 
you just stood there 
with a puzzled look 
on your face 
and I knew 
it was not you I saw 
it was him 
and I'm sorry for that 
it wasn't you I was looking at 
it was him 
and the tide went out 
and didn't come back in 
and I was standing there alone 
looking out to sea
looking out to sea

© 2014 TrilbyYates  

Fair Winds And Following Seas

Sea breeze - a few glasses of wine
Conversations that go astray
Loose lips sail ships
From the traditional
“…what if’s…”
“…would you…”
Promises we do not need
Insecurities come to light
While others are put to rest
Love is not a link
In a chain that binds
But instead the feathers
In an angel’s wings
Teaching us how to fly
And as we hold on to one another
Wrapped in a blanket of delight
If there is never a second 
Crossing of our paths
Wishing you always…
 
"Fair Winds and Following Seas."


© 2014 TrilbyYates

Walk The Streets Of Tribeca

I walk the streets 
where you used to live, 
the city you thrived in
The city you fell in love with, 
the city that set you free;
while at the same time crippling you - 
taking away any sense of coherency
But, you, you were alright, 
you were a shining star
you were on fire, 
the pretty boy 
with the moody green eyes, 
the seductive faraway stare
You lived in the city 
that pulled you over the edge 
Submerging you into darkness,
driving you to cut deeper 
until your art bled 
into oblivion 
Your creative energy dripped 
like an intravenous 
main lining junkie;
scores strewn across the floor 
Your best work,
your brilliance blinds 
The toll -
twenty years 
of your precious life, 
twenty years 
of a collective genius 
I walk the streets 
where you used to live, 
the city you played in, 
wishing I had known you then -
The clubs that filled 
with locals 
1970-something 
vagabonds 
creative types;
the abstract overly talented 
movers and shakers -
to the point of their own absurdity,
just to catch a glimpse 
of your vibrancy -
bringing out the lacking 
in their own luster 
You were 
one of a kind, 
a rare find 
Unique in a time 
of originality 
An artist to your core,
and yet between all the lines 
praise, paranoia and deception 
the purity of your soul 
was lost on most 
and stolen from you 
before you understood 
what it meant to have a life;
only to let life have you - 
Twenty years you said, 
twenty years and it had to end
There was joy in your eyes 
as they took you away,
a sense of peace 
We didn't realize 
our last kiss 
was an unknown 
...farewell 
Finally, twenty years lost
and finally you had it all
And in that finality,
in a moment,
in an instant,
you were gone...
I walk the streets 
in the city you loved
I walk the streets of Tribeca,
imagine running into you  -
Our eyes would meet,
on some magical level
there is a glimmer of recognition
You would smile only slightly
then turn away 
I'd write my name
on a piece of paper 
and slip it into your pocket
as you brush past  -
looking back
knowing you will find it
and fall in love with me 
...someday

© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Geographically Undesirable

The rain is falling
wind is singing songs
beyond the dunes
Dark clouds form overhead 
and the waves have 
kicked up a notch;
perfect back drop 
for a romantic at heart
pinned with dedication 
to my worn out sleeve
I walk barefoot in the tide
emotion and passion
rush in pulling at my vulnerabilities 
But don't get me wrong 
I'm not complaining,
or ready to bag the ideology 
Naivete pure and innocent 
somewhere out there 
beyond the horizon, 
beyond the geographically 
...undesirable tag -
Burning sage 
and lighting candles
dancing under a full moon
Whispers vibrate hidden stories;
secrets shared but never told
And I continue blind faith
and wounded glory
not for the weary or fainthearted,
that somewhere out there
value isn't measured in miles
and sparks will fly outside the radius
imaginary lines drawn in the sand
Somewhere out there 
beyond the horizon, 
beyond the geographically 
...undesirable tag -


© 2014 TrilbyYates 

I Live With No Regrets

Wishful thinking
a few Hail Mary's 
and an Act Of Contrition 
thrown in for good luck 
 - keeps me honest
when I spend to much
time alone...
Once you asked
if I was raised 
as a Catholic girl 
Big Apple shines bright
in beautiful Italian brown eyes
you said
All I could see
were emerald shades 
of green in yours
reflecting in retrospect 
is like looking
beyond the mirror
Undeniable passion
while sparks flew
and we strolled along 
The River Seine 
Your hands soft and electric 
reached inside my chest
grabbed a hold of my heart 
as if there would be no tomorrow -
     (took my breath away)
future pending - 
 - and there wasn't ...

But, the question remains,
asked to often 
out of focus 
a balancing act
high wire stress factor
cliff hanger -
Would we have taken that walk
if we had known? 

The light flickered -
then went out -  

I think, yes...I live with no regrets


© 2014 TrilbyYates   

Twilight Internet Star Crossed Lovers

Alternative time 
burn out 
and insecurities soar 
like the wounded angel 
I once was.
Flying too close
to the sun 
a virtue in disguise  -
And there was 
a moment of ease 
and a desire 
to lean in closer 
than allowed;
to take finger tips 
to your lips 
and hush 
the secrets away.
A kiss that could 
have been 
a once in a lifetime
passion between 
strangers...
A missed opportunity?
We may never know -
But wishful thinking 
and hope continues
to smolder
so very slowly 
I close my eyes
look deeply into yours
and see all that 
I will ever need to know
...twilight internet 
star crossed lovers -

© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Note To MB

(Scene set up: this was written a while ago...wounded pride, ego kept me from posting...but with all things as time passes so does negativity...moving forward brighter days ahead!)

Note to MB:

Nothing is keeping my feet on the ground 
short flight from yesterday 
filling up on jet fuel 
to keep all those tattered demons away.
And how do I separate you 
from a gift from God -
...when my heart was highjacked back in the day 
with a love that flowed forever so freely 
from him to me eyes so green it made my heart ache!
Now and then I walk past his grave 
and a hand from the "heavenly beyond" catches me off guard 
with a sense of warmth and recollection.

Today I question your intentions and my own 
because I don't need or want you 
the way I did him...

With warm regards for better luck next time around,
TY


© 2013 Trilby  

Newport Nights

Hands held tight 
our lives hanging 
by a thread 
Newport nights
comfort in a smile
kisses deep 
with passion 
and promise 
hopes that this 
crazy world 
could stop for us
for a moment 
just one single 
moment 
in time 
when all that we 
saw
heard
felt 
would remain true 
and timeless...
...but nothing seems 
to truly last forever 
and words 
that can't be taken back 
sting at times 
when tenderness 
from long ago 
remains
wanted and needed...
...there was 
a story 
we told 
it was sweet 
til the bitter end 
and with each day 
that passes 
and month 
that turns 
into another year 
I still think of you 
and wonder 
how could you 
forget 
how could you 
not take pause 
and reach out...

...Newport nights...


© 2013 Trilby

http://youtu.be/C0hr2HWOohM