MORE THOUGHTS...
Every second, every moment is etched in my mind - green eyes, promises, music, words, tears, touch, kiss, scent, love, fear, terror, loss, such deep everlasting loss...
No looking back, visions are like memories being played over and over without a pause button for some sense of relief...
Cancer he says in a cold but yet humane way. A pro at dropping the bomb like a WWII 18 year old soldier in the cockpit of a B52.
The heart weeps and opens wide the doors to self imposed Penance; just another Blues song with a touch of Lennon ~
La dolce vita and a cup of espresso with the Pope, a ferry ride to any island, walk the beach, feel the sand, the sun pouring light into love...
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Laughter fades into the night as shadows turn from shades of gray to liquid silver sparking glimmers of light that seep into my heart.
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There are some things in life we can control...anger, violence, integrity, maybe even our life's passion (although I think that's the nature vs nurture debate)...but love...umm don't think so.
Love comes from a place beyond the human part of us...maybe even a divine part or "heavenly" source.
Ever have that jolt when you meet someone? Face to face or the more modern version "cyberspace"?
And no matter what you tell yourself or how you try to deny what your heart is bleeding for it just continues to hemorrhage with an overwhelming yearning to be accepted, cherished, touched and "loved".
The images keep rolling in your mind like a movie, playing over and over, scene after tender scene.
Love, unconditionally falling from point A to Z in less than a heart beat.
Love, an emotion, a feeling, a blessing and one we have no control over.
We will fall and land on our feet or on our knees - but at the end of the day,
love will be what it is meant to be...because love is absolute.
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There are a few things that help numb what has already died within...most are illegal...
Pray, plead, promise - beg, cry, scream and swear. Deny or accept. I'm convinced nothing can change the path we were on, NOTHING!
Memories are like little movies we can play over and over - black and white or in color, add music for special effect.
Flowers in my hair, you would smile and kiss me...such an angel you would say while holding my hand as if time were slipping away...
Twin flame - to have experienced unconditional love and acceptance makes life cold and dark when the other flame has been blown out...
From heart to head and back again...heart aches, head is the medicine that keeps the fever down and memories at bay...dream on love...
Guilt, guilt, every minute counts. Denial is a tool - keep the ticking time bomb tick-tock for another day. Oh to have those days back...
Peeking from behind the shadows there is nothing but a hollow echo that bounces back and forth, back and forth...endless echo...bounce
A tiny box, open slowly, a piece of paper folded neatly, placed inside. Unfold, words written. TY I love you and will always be with you JY
Join the fight, tell my story, symbolic wrist band - bold words - FIGHT LUNG CANCER...words from an aching heart sound hollow...
Empty spaces, between each line there is a void, a shadow dances in the night simply waiting for what will follow...
Bulls eye, right on target, nail on the head...you said it, I felt it...heart explodes into tiny pieces.
September spirits gather, slight wind carries a song to you while October waits its turn to mourn - Fall, how appropriate..
Our father who art in heaven, ourfatherwhoartinheavenourfatherwhoartinheaven...questions, pleading...no answer-silence...
Two steps forward several steps back to a time when life was full of love you and me never enough time, now the weekends are too long...
The feel of your hand in mine, a tender kiss, shared smile, eyes meet, a peaceful heart - you are here with me...I wake up confused...tears
Is there ever a time when loss fades to fond memories? When a smile has laughter on the cusp? Soul singing, soul singing...longing words
Scattered thoughts with one line that is steadfast, a common thread...a sense of loss shadows my days...shake free from it he whispers...
A new day...not much has changed...tides up, moved the room around...new view - life
TV, internet, ipod, stereo, help quiet the...lack of...
Early Sunday morning the rain is falling wind blowing the empty space next to me woke me up...sounds of silence
Working on a new book...Widow's Walk...it has been suggested that it will be cathartic! My name is Trilby, I am a widow...
Q. Do you rhyme when you write your poetry? A. No, not something I intentionally avoid, it's just not part of my natural flow.
I'm lost in a world of memories, music and thought - my words, my writing keep me sane...for the most part :)
His song is carried in the wind like a breath from a past filled with love.
Found an electronic card from my husband - it was sent a week before we found out he had lung cancer - lots of tears. Grief continues...
Steps taken the past will follow, the heart lingers in tomorrow -
Stand still it will pass you by, blow kisses to the sky...
Never Look Away
Oh the senses soar
each step creates
an experience,
upon a sunset high,
pink, purple harmonious~
eyes meet,
perfection in a moment~
a shift,
crumbs fall to the floor...
glancing back hear the music play
smile and never look away
smile and never look away
you are always with me love like the images that play dance to and fro wrapped neatly around my life, wrapped neatly around my heart...
© 2010 Trilby Yates
Photo by AKM 2010
