Love Chanting

Summer sun 
short circuit 
cuts directly 
from my brain 
to my heart
eyes close
and I can see
...a clear path  - to you

Each ray 
that shoots 
across the bow 
of this 
magnificent vessel 
mind and spirit
carrying with it 
a message
...of love - to you

Chanting with the tide 
full moon is on the rise

Goddess of Love
Goddess of Light

                                                               photo by TYates


© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Beach Boys

Hot steamy summer day...not a cloud in the sky; brilliant blue dome of color - a slight breeze floats by on the up beat of a song dancing through the air; off in the distance sailboats lean, lean, lean stretching canvas and rails dip in the salty sea - flashback summer sweat dripping kisses...glorious sight makes my heart race.

Beach scene high tide, scent of coconut oil is like a time chaser – burst of images black and white, Kodachrome edited memories. Families, babies, teens, college kids, Gran and Pop - fill the sandy shoreline with souvenir beach towels and beach chairs; radiant red, seafaring blue and lemon yellow umbrellas adorn the landscape making up an amazing painters pallet. Aroma therapy and visual overload - in this surrounding I am thrilled to be alive!

Strategically placing myself on the fringes – a space between me and the masses. A buffer from all the chatter and one on one contact - my comfort zone just left of everything and nothing - with one foot hanging over the edge; acting as an anchor keeping me from wandering to far out in an endless sea. A beach day to listen to music - drifting away on notes and combinations of words; all stirring emotions and pushing fantasies for later creative use – deep breath in/exhale - blow. Moments of "shear poetry".

A group of three “t’ween” boys invade my peripheral vision and my solitude. Soft images flurry past, intense energy…carrying plastic beach shovels – with definite intentions. There were no words exchanged, an innate plan was brewing and clearly understood by all participants.

As much as I tried to ignore this group of adolescent males, (they reminded me of boys from my past) it was impossible...I was captivated by the "boys club" dance - and felt privy after so many years being on the outside secretly looking in, never understanding what made them tick and now I had a clear up front view - camouflaging myself behind a pair of sunglasses instead of my naiveté . 

Quickly personalities started to pop...the shy one, the leader, the funny boy - these roles seemed set in stone, not interchangeable. Each knew their character and played it uncomfortably well. Pigeon holed for a moment in time.

I sat back, shades on, ear-buds in and observed with delight!

The boys started to dig a hole in the sand, within 30 minutes it was clearly going to be a very large hole. Occasionally a group of "t' ween" girls would slowly walk past; seemingly ignoring the boys...a little flip of their hair, arms linked and giggles...boys reacting, doing boy things - they jumped in the 4' deep hole, threw sand at each other, swore and laughed and dug faster as if they were just injected with high levels of testosterone.

The girls circled around several times, swishing their feet into the sand, hips swaying overly exaggerated this way and that as they walked by. Flirtatious glances exchanged, occasional eye contact and then the uncontrollable bursts of blushing red covered cheeks were a dead give away. A vision of pure innocent seduction; beach boys from long ago...summer in the city. Motown playing and dancing on the sidewalks - sweet delicious memories.

Off in the distance songs from the concession stand began to play summer songs, the hit list...Heatwave, Under The Boardwalk, Girl From Ipanema, In The Summer Time...on and on drum beat, finger snapping melodies swept me away finally into a deep sleep...

© 2014 TrilbyYates 

My Heart Reveals It All

Summer slumber 
dreams
billow in a warm breeze
while fall steps out 
in colored glory 
and my heart reflects
all that have come 
and all that have gone 
regret seems 
a shallow grave 
without substance 
or worry
so as time passes... and it does 
questions 
of what it all meant 
rise above 
the sense of loss 
but you my friend... heart felt
held me 
through the night 
and watched 
the sun rise 
did you wonder 
...what would become of this newly felt love 
or would you watch it 
fade away 
like any other day 
as the tides of life 
rise and fall
winter winds blow 
and spring's thaw is inevitable
you remain hidden away
yet my heart reveals it all... 

© 2013 Trilby   

Photographs and Fantasies ~ August 2011

Ari ~ Summer Daze ~ August 2011

Umbrella and Clouds - August 2011

Swinging In The Rain - Penfield Beach August 2011

Yellow Slicker - August 2011

Calm Before The Storm - August 2011

All photographs by Trilby Yates     

© 2011 Trilby Yates

Heat Wave July 2011

Jetty Walk ~ Summer 2011 (SC & AM)

Heat Wave

Steamy sweltering
take a deep breath
air is thick and warm...

Summer sun
cloaked in a haze
shades of pale blue
feathered sky wispy clouds
wrap around finger tips
gentle hands dripping
in the scent of coconut oil

Floating carefree muffled sounds
a mellow song serenade
carried within a slight breeze
while dancing in the streets
keeps the beat
R&B lives on…

© 2011 Trilby Yates

September 2010

MORE THOUGHTS...
Every second, every moment is etched in my mind - green eyes, promises, music, words, tears, touch, kiss, scent, love, fear, terror, loss, such deep everlasting loss...

No looking back, visions are like memories being played over and over without a pause button for some sense of relief...

Cancer he says in a cold but yet humane way. A pro at dropping the bomb like a WWII 18 year old soldier in the cockpit of a B52.

The heart weeps and opens wide the doors to self imposed Penance; just another Blues song with a touch of Lennon ~

La dolce vita and a cup of espresso with the Pope, a ferry ride to any island, walk the beach, feel the sand, the sun pouring light into love...

****

Laughter fades into the night as shadows turn from shades of gray to liquid silver sparking glimmers of light that seep into my heart.

****

There are some things in life we can control...anger, violence, integrity, maybe even our life's passion (although I think that's the nature vs nurture debate)...but love...umm don't think so.
Love comes from a place beyond the human part of us...maybe even a divine part or "heavenly" source.
Ever have that jolt when you meet someone? Face to face or the more modern version "cyberspace"?
And no matter what you tell yourself or how you try to deny what your heart is bleeding for it just continues to hemorrhage with an overwhelming yearning to be accepted, cherished, touched and "loved".
The images keep rolling in your mind like a movie, playing over and over, scene after tender scene.
Love, unconditionally falling from point A to Z in less than a heart beat.
Love, an emotion, a feeling, a blessing and one we have no control over.
We will fall and land on our feet or on our knees - but at the end of the day,
love will be what it is meant to be...because love is absolute.

****

There are a few things that help numb what has already died within...most are illegal...

Pray, plead, promise - beg, cry, scream and swear. Deny or accept. I'm convinced nothing can change the path we were on, NOTHING!

Memories are like little movies we can play over and over - black and white or in color, add music for special effect.

Flowers in my hair, you would smile and kiss me...such an angel you would say while holding my hand as if time were slipping away...

Twin flame - to have experienced unconditional love and acceptance makes life cold and dark when the other flame has been blown out...

From heart to head and back again...heart aches, head is the medicine that keeps the fever down and memories at bay...dream on love...

Guilt, guilt, every minute counts. Denial is a tool - keep the ticking time bomb tick-tock for another day. Oh to have those days back...

Peeking from behind the shadows there is nothing but a hollow echo that bounces back and forth, back and forth...endless echo...bounce

A tiny box, open slowly, a piece of paper folded neatly, placed inside. Unfold, words written. TY I love you and will always be with you JY

Join the fight, tell my story, symbolic wrist band - bold words - FIGHT LUNG CANCER...words from an aching heart sound hollow...

Empty spaces, between each line there is a void, a shadow dances in the night simply waiting for what will follow...

Bulls eye, right on target, nail on the head...you said it, I felt it...heart explodes into tiny pieces.

September spirits gather, slight wind carries a song to you while October waits its turn to mourn - Fall, how appropriate..

Our father who art in heaven, ourfatherwhoartinheavenourfatherwhoartinheaven...questions, pleading...no answer-silence...

Two steps forward several steps back to a time when life was full of love you and me never enough time, now the weekends are too long...

The feel of your hand in mine, a tender kiss, shared smile, eyes meet, a peaceful heart - you are here with me...I wake up confused...tears

Is there ever a time when loss fades to fond memories? When a smile has laughter on the cusp? Soul singing, soul singing...longing words

Scattered thoughts with one line that is steadfast, a common thread...a sense of loss shadows my days...shake free from it he whispers...

A new day...not much has changed...tides up, moved the room around...new view - life

TV, internet, ipod, stereo, help quiet the...lack of...

Early Sunday morning the rain is falling wind blowing the empty space next to me woke me up...sounds of silence

Working on a new book...Widow's Walk...it has been suggested that it will be cathartic! My name is Trilby, I am a widow...

Q. Do you rhyme when you write your poetry? A. No, not something I intentionally avoid, it's just not part of my natural flow.

I'm lost in a world of memories, music and thought - my words, my writing keep me sane...for the most part :)

His song is carried in the wind like a breath from a past filled with love.

Found an electronic card from my husband - it was sent a week before we found out he had lung cancer - lots of tears. Grief continues...




Steps taken the past will follow, the heart lingers in tomorrow -
Stand still it will pass you by, blow kisses to the sky...

Never Look Away

Oh the senses soar
each step creates
an experience,
upon a sunset high,
pink, purple harmonious~
eyes meet,
perfection in a moment~
a shift,
crumbs fall to the floor...
glancing back hear the music play
smile and never look away
smile and never look away

you are always with me love like the images that play dance to and fro wrapped neatly around my life, wrapped neatly around my heart...

© 2010 Trilby Yates

Photo by AKM 2010

Summer 2009

Bitter Sweet Time

There is no time like the present
Keep one foot in the here and now
While the other dangles freely – wind beneath
One hand waves farewell to new comers
The other tips the head waiter with a smirk
Wooden nickels hold their value in this Land of Oz
Like souvenirs at a carnival - children smile
And even though this ghost ship is half empty
Like the champagne glass resting peacefully - aura of decadence
The heart cannot let go of dreams and visions
Plans left incomplete, anniversaries come and go

I will follow…
In time, in bitter sweet time ~

© 2009 Trilby Yates

Slow flow...thoughts and photo's...

Bended Knee

Walking a path that is unfamiliar
Kicking stones at the crossroad and the
Crucifix faces places unknown with
Hands outstretched pointing the way
And while it never touches me
Each step wanders further from
That sanctuary for poets and martyrs known
And the questions of evolution and faith collide
With smoke of incense lace pattern’s rise
Over an alter of Saints and Sinners
That we trust naively with each step
Taking our chances with Hope as our Guardian Angel
Rosary beads fall gradually to the ground
Slipping from the grasp of a zealot's hands
Yet I continually take the time
To reflect on bended knees
With little to no anticipation
That my prayers will ever be heard …

********

First Yawn

First yawn of summer
A slight breeze
The air is warm and cloaked
In an early morning walk
I hear the surround sound
Of a bird’s song
As insects dance above
Blades of silky green
Threads spider webs
Weave across the lawn
While flowers tire of being in full bloom
After spring’s burst of joie de vivre
To the slow exit
Of another season
That comes around
Full circle over and over again...


Photo's - Rebecca @ work, Paris home for summer, Me sunset sailing, Ari in Paris, France, Me and Jerry NY apartment.

Poems - Pamela "Trilby" Yates

© 2008 Pamela Viscomi Yates