Showing posts with label innocence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label innocence. Show all posts

Saturday, February 27, 2016

One Word

Just one word, one word - sharp and cutting.
Gut reaction.
Automatic visceral response.
Anger, fear, shame, confusion, bewilderment.
One word, domino effect, emotional draining flash back
...punch in the stomach, what the fuck not quite an epiphany
slow realization, an unwinding.
Slow with meaning.
A learning; knowledge filled shaping, the future bend.
Young girl unknown meaning, one word
A pattern - "…you wait outside…"
Sunny Saturday, waiting outside.
"…you can't come in, but we can play together, my father says you're a wop..."
"My father says you're like a nigger, like a monkey, we don't let animals in our house; except the cat and dog, but we can play together…"
Fifteen years later, I helped her elope.
She climbed out of her bedroom window, 
I waited down the street in my VW Bus.
We drove to the town hall and she married a man of color.

Just one word, one more word - sharp and cutting.
Gut reaction.
Automatic visceral response.
Anger, fear, shame, confusion, bewilderment.
One word, domino effect, emotional draining flash back
...punch in the stomach, what the fuck not quite an epiphany
slow realization, an unwinding.
Slow with meaning.
A learning; a knowledge filled shaping, a future bend.
Young girl unknown meaning, one word,
"…I like you, but my brother said I can't because you're a dago…"
A pattern - "…we can still like each other but no one can know…"
We walked past each other in the halls, middle school, high school.
Our eyes would meet, we would smile, but we both knew what we didn't know.
Ten years later, you became my lover.
We spent the summer together, we didn't talk about the past but it was there.
We both understood, we knew and we cried together.
I said goodbye to you in September,
and watched your motorcycle fade off into the sunset.

Just one word, one word - sharp and cutting.
Gut reaction.
Automatic visceral response.
Anger, fear, shame, confusion, bewilderment.
One word, domino effect, emotional draining flash back
...punch in the stomach, what the fuck not quite an epiphany
slow realization, an unwinding.
Slow with meaning.
A learning; knowledge filled shaping, the future bend.
Young girl unknown meaning, one word.
It only takes one word…

© 2016 TrilbyYates











Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Not That Kid

Making gum wrapper chains  
snap pop New York kid shuffle
innocence was a game 
we never intended to play 
it was always like blowing smoke 
into the wind
choking on the fumes 
brown paper bag huffing
the last boat has sailed
and it doesn't matter any more
because the kid can't swim anyway 
and the Atlantic waters will chill to the bone
especially when you are floating - far far from home
and as the kid wanders and wonders 
about all the cracks in the pavement
and the footsteps that slide and shuffle - late in the night
all she recalls is the pop pop pop
and the rattle of a snake
reminiscent of an old western 1950s flick 
when only the bad guy wore black
and we all know the only snakes in the city 
wear haute couture suits
carrying pens of gold to seal deals 
that wreak havoc on the masses
and it doesn't matter where you stand - or if you stand at all
the view is the same city by city
country by country
power hungry fat cats 
belly protruding finger licking - scoping out the dessert tray
and when the fog doesn't lift quick
and it gets too thick where they sleep
the pie in the sky top floor will flip 
and shift from exclusive to tenement
and guess who is moving
where the air is clear and clean?
suddenly the eye level view 
becomes a treasured source - of pride and privilege
certainly not the kid from the block 
the kid that played Motown 
and danced in the streets
falling in love with the boy from upstate
a first kiss slow dance warm hands 
not the 2nd generation kid 
whose eyes haven't gentrified 
turning brown into blue
or a name with too many letters 
simplifying it to Joe or Sue
No, not that kid
Not that kid 
The kid we all were 
Or the kid we all knew...

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Mother Nature Is Kind

Tree branches bend 
and shuffle 
an old soft shoe 
saw dust on the floor scat 
to the seductive blow 
of the wind 
the strength and force 
of Mother Nature 
the female mother 
Queen of Rag 
Queen Bee 
stings like a bitch 
stings with venom 
and a cure to sooth
the wretched soul
a force to reckon with 
a force female in nature 
female unshakable force 
softness rests around her eyes 
the creases are love and light 
not to be mistaken 
for innocence or naivete 
but a genuine openness 
warmth to touch 
to settle into
to rest in arms and heart 
wide accepting unquestionable devotion  
no time for judgement 
no time to put salt in the wound
no time to wound the wounded

The tree branches bend 
and shuffle
old soft shoe 
saw dust on the floor scat
to the seductive blow
of the wind
- Mother Nature is kind.

© 2015 TrilbyYates 

Friday, February 27, 2015

Can't Judge A Book By Its Cover

You look at me with wide eyes 
and wonder
I tell you - you cant judge a book 
by its cover
And I'm asking you 
to take a moment
Take a quiet moment
and think it through
...I never said 
I walked on water
but I can feel 
the magic in the air
and I remember
it was never 
just a causal affair
And I know I don't need you
but I know that I want you
I know - that I want you
- until the end of our time
In that moment
when you take,
that quiet moment
and think it through;
let all the bright beautiful light
seep into you
Let the wind 
bring you back 
to the boy 
that held my hand
when we jumped the track
Singing our song
rhythm and rhyme
let it bring you back 
to the innocence
of that moment in time
- when I needed you
Remember when 
I needed you
- I'm not waiting,
not waiting
...and neither should you
I never said 
I walked on water
but I can feel 
the magic in the air
and I remember
it was never 
just a causal affair
And I know I don't need you
but I know that I want you
I know - that I want you
- until the end of our time

© 2015 TrilbyYates


Saturday, November 29, 2014

Lust And Passion

Hey...you...pssst...floating 
Lightly from high above
The cement masses
Whistles and cat calls
Reminiscent of a 50's B flick
With blonde bombshells 
And well manicured mustaches
That get twisted when the mood shifts
From scene to scene
Little girl with grown up shoes
Struts her stuff
While taking another puff
Long thin 100s imported 
Via her new daddy's 
Best stash dipped 
In candy coated cocaine
For character reference
And a little push
All for the sake of its own
Gentle manipulative shove
She slips from the right - side of the curve 
To the depths of hell in waiting
There is no bounce left in her step
Looking up with a child's eye
Batting her thick false lashes
Trying to disguise
Her lack of expertise
In matters of lust and passion
What entices the streets
Of a city that never sleeps;
Never protecting its young
and innocent - taking from the weak...?

© 2014 TrilbyYates

Saturday, December 7, 2013

You Do Not Know Me

I am
a prisoner
of time and space
held within
the boundaries
of a sanctioned
God anointed birth
the law of the land
the law of religion
and unquestioned faith
the law of responsibility
to all those
that have come
before
and after
the psychological
weapons
chains of societal
norms
guilt, shame, selfishness
keeping me here
with one foot
always firmly
planted
in a place of
- non -
in a space
of absence -
conflicting presence
a calming heart beat
without
a detectable pulse
a heart beat
that keeps
the rhythm
and rhyme
with notes
and emotion
linked with
highs and lows
to verbs and nouns
I am
not merely
made up
of a past
and present
potential future
flesh and bone -
I am
emotions
sensations
feelings
vibrations
the wind
or lack of
I am
the unknown
the object
of your
affection
occasional
rejection
sequential reflection
yet you
do not know
me -
...have never known
anything more
than what
I
revealed
concealed
without malice
of  intention
but with
self preservation
adaptation 
innate
guided fate
all that my
limitations
could allow...
the past
moves fast
it becomes
a comfortable chair
that is
intentionally placed
by the hands
of a  
"gentler God"
with a story
how life
is learned
heaven
is earned
in a living room
of comings
and goings
adding this
or that
the past
knows
more
of its present
and future
than the
unpredictability
of life
all
unto its own
they
whom ever
do not know
me
and before
I
venture
off
to that
unparalleled space
of the
unknown
heavenly Grace
you who have grown
and have known
even less
and never
reverberate
or contemplate 
the reasons why...

© 2013 Trilby   
 

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Life Line Snap

I am a one liner
cliche
oblivious daydreamer
fantasy shaker
one foot in front of the other stumbling block
self proclaimed prophet to the faithless
magnificent enemy of a higher order
I am identifiable
puff of vaporized humanity
sexuality twist
gender bender
fraudulent soul seeker
status disclaimer
lacking moral compass deformity
stolen innocence imposter
race confused
bouncing reflector
Black, White, Yellow, Red
once in a life time off beat charlatan
I walk, talk and live the consequence
broken chain torn bleeding heart
surrender to none
open book closed and shamed
baffled by my own confusion
eyes wise lessons yet to learn
crimson lips sink stolen ships
white knuckling way of life
blood soaked delusional story teller
love lacking compartmentalized wanderer
truth seeking denier
all is not lost when all is not found

...life line snap

© 2013 Trilby


Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Choices Made

I am not 
enlightened 
reaching 
for that place of zen 
searching 
for peaceful moments 
that seem to fade 
into a harmonious 
hum 
the calming thoughts 
that fill empty spaces 
leaving in between 
nothingness
void 
of the shift in direction 
the path chosen...
guided by birth right
domino effect
choices followed 
the children to the pied piper
choices made 
from broken toys
scattered about
choices made 
...non the less

© 2013 Trilby