Depression

Shades drawn closed 
darkness blankets 
every corner of the room 
shadows become one 
flattened and obscure 
off in the distance 
are muted sounds
a whistling tea pot 
hopefully someone 
will attend to its needs 
wrapped gingerly within 
solitary seclusion and doubt 
...insecurity has become 
a knife held to my throat 
by my own hand 
widow's lasting garb 
fits like a second skin 
forming tightly around 
my waist and chest
heart beats out of necessity 
blood flows like an encore 
I hide within the day to day 
smiles and conversation 
secretly counting the seconds 
to when I might feel 
somewhat alive again 
it comes and goes 
velvet waves washing over
and a twisting churning knot 
tightens in my chest 
familiar hand reaching deep
fingers entwined
a death grip crippling
sleep comes a timely relief 
if only temporary 
ghosts and dream screams 
flutter quietly about
softly stroking my cheek
cold and damp to touch
until I rise and begin again 
praying for resolve and relief

© 2015 TrilbyYates 

Cloak And Dagger

Turning slowly
Eyes meet
Lock in an embrace
The words in my mind
Fall from your lips
Like pearls of wisdom
Dripping in sultry shades
Of day dreams
Soft lavender
With a touch of grey
Highlighting the shadows
That dance to and fro
Gentle lullaby
“Hush baby
Please don’t cry…”
Without warning
Shooting stars fall
The soul is cloaked
In a plush velvet robe
Blanketed gently by a pure
Winter snow
Covering what has yet to be seen
Magnified by a sharp pain
Like a dagger to the heart
Carving away
Silently

Cautionary tales of woe… 

© 2015 TrilbyYates

Geographically Undesirable

The rain is falling
wind is singing songs
beyond the dunes
Dark clouds form overhead 
and the waves have 
kicked up a notch;
perfect back drop 
for a romantic at heart
pinned with dedication 
to my worn out sleeve
I walk barefoot in the tide
emotion and passion
rush in pulling at my vulnerabilities 
But don't get me wrong 
I'm not complaining,
or ready to bag the ideology 
Naivete pure and innocent 
somewhere out there 
beyond the horizon, 
beyond the geographically 
...undesirable tag -
Burning sage 
and lighting candles
dancing under a full moon
Whispers vibrate hidden stories;
secrets shared but never told
And I continue blind faith
and wounded glory
not for the weary or fainthearted,
that somewhere out there
value isn't measured in miles
and sparks will fly outside the radius
imaginary lines drawn in the sand
Somewhere out there 
beyond the horizon, 
beyond the geographically 
...undesirable tag -


© 2014 TrilbyYates 

Carte Blanche

Listen to the crimson rattle! 
Death calls...
Feel the labyrinth shake!  
Earth moves...
Is it love pounding 
at the hearts door?
Or could it be 
the bubbling of skin 
so thick
that no one dare 
come close enough
nor get under it?
Embrace the roll that comes 
when notes and vibrations soar  
to hidden places sunken deep within
and we acknowledge
there is nothing more. 
Withered soul allows 
the moment to penetrate,
reverberate 
what life was meant to be...
Not an illusion 
or lack luster cover 
flip pages of magazine images. 
Feather dust creases of ageless eyes gleam.
Hiss, "...back at you baby..." carries no weight, 
no substance only darkest void.
A seductive glance 
back and forth high,
when the silver spoon 
falls methodically 
from perched thin lined lips.
And they never question why.
Commonality flies 
in the face 
of redundancy 
when our uniqueness 
separates us...by 6 degrees?
Carte blanche 
to a permanent place 
in a universe without boundaries. 

© 2014 TrilbyYates

 

You Do Not Know Me

I am
a prisoner
of time and space
held within
the boundaries
of a sanctioned
God anointed birth
the law of the land
the law of religion
and unquestioned faith
the law of responsibility
to all those
that have come
before
and after
the psychological
weapons
chains of societal
norms
guilt, shame, selfishness
keeping me here
with one foot
always firmly
planted
in a place of
- non -
in a space
of absence -
conflicting presence
a calming heart beat
without
a detectable pulse
a heart beat
that keeps
the rhythm
and rhyme
with notes
and emotion
linked with
highs and lows
to verbs and nouns
I am
not merely
made up
of a past
and present
potential future
flesh and bone -
I am
emotions
sensations
feelings
vibrations
the wind
or lack of
I am
the unknown
the object
of your
affection
occasional
rejection
sequential reflection
yet you
do not know
me -
...have never known
anything more
than what
I
revealed
concealed
without malice
of  intention
but with
self preservation
adaptation 
innate
guided fate
all that my
limitations
could allow...
the past
moves fast
it becomes
a comfortable chair
that is
intentionally placed
by the hands
of a  
"gentler God"
with a story
how life
is learned
heaven
is earned
in a living room
of comings
and goings
adding this
or that
the past
knows
more
of its present
and future
than the
unpredictability
of life
all
unto its own
they
whom ever
do not know
me
and before
I
venture
off
to that
unparalleled space
of the
unknown
heavenly Grace
you who have grown
and have known
even less
and never
reverberate
or contemplate 
the reasons why...

© 2013 Trilby   
 

Band Of Gold

Bands of gold 
fall silently 
in a slow motion 
blur 
and time slips by 
without exception 
to the rule 
and nothing speaks 
louder than truth 
being told 
fingers wrapped 
desperately 
around the past 
pried loose 
gentle words 
spoken 
easing the pain 
while candle light 
softens the blow 

...it's time to hold tight and time to let go

© 2013 Trilby

Summer breeze 2012

 Self portrait ~ Your Shirt

Warm breeze and sunshine
off in the distance is a sound
so familiar it makes me weep
whispers I love you
and sighs of contentment
leave me wandering
in rooms from the past
the day to day never dull
or mundane
the scent of you remains...
I wear your shirt 
arms wrapped around me
like a sweet song of love and devotion
melody penetrates my soul
comfort is held close in cotton and linen
threads of color and texture
you skip lightly through my thoughts
like dandelions blown from youthful lips
to wishes of promise and forever after -
is there a tomorrow with love and laughter
or simply windmills spinning in a storm
a bit of hope clouded in shades of gray
with a touch of lavender for all the maybes
but my heart hesitates
and my direction continues
in a consistent loop
of doubt and insecurities
grabbing hold of my inhibition
ruling my moral compass
and as I pretend to move forward
occasionally wishing for a lover 
reality remains the same
you were a perfect fit
to an imperfect woman
and now nothing else matters...

To JY always and forever love TY
Anniversary July 1